As a single woman, I get hit on all the time by men from various walks of life, and that’s to be expected. But what I don’t necessarily expect is to get hit on by married men. Why? Well, because they’re married!
I’m at that age where most of my friends are married, my parents have been married for 47 years, and my aunts and uncles stayed together until death did they part…literally. So with that being said, I am one to have the utmost respect for marriage as an institution under God. When you get hit on by a married man, more than likely, he probably wants you to be his sidepiece. But what happens when you get hit on by a man that is separated and waiting to sign the papers for his divorce?
So let’s say that you, as the person reading this blog, have the utmost respect for marriage. The question is, when do you have the utmost respect for marriage? Is it when the couple is together in a fulfilling happy marriage? Do you still have respect for marriage when the couple is having problems and one of them is ready to leave the relationship? What about when the couple is separated/legally separated and in the process of getting a divorce, do you still have the utmost respect for marriage?
Maybe there’s a better question. Is separated good enough for you to move forward in pursuing a relationship with someone whose marriage is not legally dissolved?
I’ve had countless discussions with people, particularly men that are separated from their wives, about why separated isn’t good enough for me. There are those who understand my views on the subject, but there are some who seriously oppose my views.
But the reasons why I believe separated isn’t good enough are:
- Separated is still married. There is always a possibility that you could get back together. I mean, she is his wife, and they owe it to each other to try as many times as possible to mend their relationship. So I don’t want to be caught up in a situation where feelings get involved, and the man goes back to his wife.
- My relationship with pleasing God is so much more important than pleasing my own flesh. According to the Bible, Exodus 20:14 states, “You shall not commit adultery.” So if you are still married and enter into a relationship with someone else, both of you are committing adultery.
- I love myself too much to be with a married man. If he likes me that much then, he would respect my decision and not contact me until after he has gotten an official divorce document. Yes, I’d need to see the original document up-close and in person.
So for me, a man being separated is just not good enough! Is it good enough for you? What are your thoughts?
~Wise Ways
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