I recently asked my Facebook friends why men should get married and to no surprise, there were a lot of crickets. A few of my more religious friends quoted the scripture “He who finds a wife finds a good thing,” some made reference to tax breaks and of course there were the claims that married men live longer.
Now I’m not one to contradict the good book but I really feel that passage should read “He who finds a good wife finds a good thing,” because a bad wife can mess up your life worse than a bad boss can. The tax breaks are nice but there are other ways around the old IRS code book that doesn’t involve putting your finances at risk from the ever present specter of divorce and as for living longer, I always figured it would be best to die relatively young and leave a good looking corpse.
From Facebook I took to one of my local watering holes and put the question to the gentlemen there who have been married for decades. Their somewhat predictable answers were; constant companionship, a snuggle buddy, hot meals, clean clothes, not wanting to die alone and my favorite answer, someone who can’t testify against you in court.
Okay, let’s look at those. I can have constant companionship from either my collie Simba, a roommate or better yet a live in girlfriend who can also serve as a snuggle buddy. I genuinely enjoy cooking and how hard is it to throw a load of clothes in the washer and dryer? As for not wanting to die alone, I’m pretty sure a nurse will be there and the only time I’ve ever been a defendant in a trial was when my ex divorced me and believe you me, she testified!
So why get married? Why tie yourself down to one person? Why risk the agony of divorce? Well in my humble opinion, you get married because it’s the right thing to do for a woman you love. As much as we try to pretend we don’t care, public opinion and perception matters. Marriage is still revered in this society. It announces to the world that you are an adult who decided to make an honest woman out of your girlfriend. Want to see a woman’s chest swell with pride just watch her when you introduce her as your wife or when she tells someone, “this is my husband.” She knows you chose her over everyone else and no girlfriend is going to love you like a wife loves her husband.
Being a married man also helps your career. Bosses think more of family men, they are perceived to be more responsible and less likely to quit on a whim and I know for a fact, if a firm is downsizing and there are two employees to choose from, all things being equal, they will retain the married man.
Last but not least there are the children. The absolute best way for a man to be in his children’s life is to be married to their mother. One family, one name the way it’s supposed to be.
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